The problem
Vague guidelines breed uncertainty and suspicion. That is the whole problem, in six words.
Here is a test you can run in a minute. Where does a disagreement over who owns a task go in your workplace? Where does a harassment allegation go? Where would you go if the person you needed to talk to sat two levels above you? If you cannot answer all three without guessing, or the answers are all the same, you have the gap this model is built to close.
The Difficult Conversations Playbook closes it with a short structure. It starts from a demand: a resilient culture requires clear, legally compliant, and transparent HR policies.
One honest note before the model. The Playbook gives it a single page. That is thin, and we would rather say so than pad it. What follows is the model as written, the reasoning around it from two other chapters of the same book, and a way to test it against your own workplace. It is a starting structure, not a finished policy.
The mechanism
Three tiers, matched to the size of the conflict
- Tier 1: The Open-Door Foundation (Peers). Employees are trained to resolve task-related and minor interpersonal conflicts autonomously at the peer level using SBI and DESC.
- Tier 2: Managerial Escalation (Direct leadership). If peer dialogue fails, the issue escalates to direct leadership. Managers are held accountable for early engagement.
- Tier 3: HR and Neutral Review (HR specialists, external mediators). For entrenched disputes, harassment allegations, or severe power imbalances: immediate access to HR specialists or external mediators.
Why hierarchy is in the model at all. Chapter 14 of the same Playbook explains the pressure point: when a subordinate tries to resolve a dispute with a senior executive, the power imbalance amplifies the subordinate's threat response. The same chapter puts a duty on leaders, who must proactively dismantle hierarchical barriers by establishing conversational ground rules, adopting intellectual humility, and using inquiry-based communication. A structure that sends every dispute up one chain gives that amplified threat response nowhere else to go. Tier 3 is the Playbook's answer to the severe cases. That connection is our reading, not a sentence in the book.
Tier 1 is not free. The model says employees are trained, which means somebody has to teach SBI and DESC before the door means anything. SBI keeps a hard conversation on what happened: it anchors in a specific context and describes the exact, observable actions without assigning motives. DESC adds a request about the future, which is why the Playbook calls it superior to SBI for boundary-setting and demanding behavioral change.
Tier 2 puts a duty on managers. Managers are held accountable for early engagement. Being a place to complain to is not enough.
Tier 3 reads as a door, not a rung. The Playbook's phrase is immediate access, tied to three kinds of case. A policy built from this should say so in plain words, so nobody has to try Tier 1 on a harassment allegation first. That is our recommendation, subject to counsel.
What the page leaves open. The Playbook's page does not define how early "early" is, does not set response times, and does not describe what happens inside each tier. Those are the parts your policy has to supply, with counsel.
The protocol
Write the three tiers in plain words
One page. Who handles what at each tier, in words a new hire could follow. The Playbook's standard is clear, legally compliant, and transparent. A policy people cannot find or read is the vague guideline the Playbook warns about.
Train Tier 1
Teach SBI and DESC to everyone, managers and employees alike. The model's Tier 1 assumes employees are trained to resolve minor conflicts at the peer level. Start with the Playbook's rule for the Behavior step in SBI: describe observable actions without assigning motives.
Make Tier 2 a duty with a definition
Write down what early engagement means in your organization. The Playbook says managers are held accountable for it and does not define it, so you have to.
Name the Tier 3 door and who stands behind it
List the cases that go straight there: entrenched disputes, harassment allegations, severe power imbalances. Name the HR specialist or external mediator, and how to reach them, because the model promises immediate access to HR specialists or external mediators.
Get it reviewed before it goes live
Take the draft to qualified legal counsel and certified HR professionals who know your jurisdiction. The Playbook's notice says these frameworks must not be implemented without that review. Among the areas it names for jurisdictional review is anti-discrimination and human rights legislation.
If you are the person with the grievance. Find out whether your workplace has written tiers like these. If it does, the card below shows what to look for. If it does not, asking is reasonable, and the answer you get tells you something. If your situation is one of the three Tier 3 types, the model's promise is immediate access to HR specialists or external mediators. This page cannot tell you what your rights are where you live.
The printable: the three-tier map
Print it. Fill it in with whoever owns HR policy where you work.